Thursday, May 25, 2006

Thursday, May 25, 2006
hannah

Bear with me new readers, perhaps you should go back a few posts to completely understand this story, being married to King Dovid's daughter, being the King of Ireland, (NOT The King Of The Irish, which has other connotations, Ireland is a country, and this is God's gift to me, perhaps I will never be there, perhaps I will), yet being a woman, transmorgifying into a man, some knowledge of Christian Kabbalah, how we have two children Orlando Matayana and the newly born Atara, a painters studio etc. and also being married to a second wife...

Hannah was ill, I did hear enough news about her...

Hannah is dead...yet I feel men are praying her back...how this happened I am not quite sure, the men around us threaten me, they have been putting 'gay' into this, I am not quite sure what that means, the devil words too near the baby, as when Erhu (hebrew name, I am not sure I can mention:) and I kiss, the men or other men that fly by or drive by on drugs and deformed minds, the people talking to me, they say: nothing, I want to see her face, over the white light, and I do, yet as soon as that she makes the sign of the cross over her face, and then I see a transformation, into negative and then a red eye, and she turns into what I call a black lion, yet is a demon, and she slashes my face... and they hear every word, I can talk to them through the birds in Aramaic Hebrew, yet often I reply two Anglo...I am not Hebrew myself...

Many things have happened, men have been taking drugs, mentioning little Ai Wu's name, a young girl I am partly related to in Hong Kong: 'Hong Kong is best!' she shouts at me last night, flashing my right eye, while I tell her I need balance, and that night I need to talk to Adal, but find it hard to...

I sit in the kitchen and feel depressed whilst it rains, then I hear a voice speak through the television, last night, what they are doing to me, mention about 1945, and then I can hardly hear those words, too busy calling my Dad a pig after an arguement we have, yet trying hard to strain my ears...the television is switched off when I walk into the room, I sit on the sofa, and listen to the rain...'----------------- kid', and then 'be quiet'.

I go to sit into the garden, and hear someone through my soul-centre, 'I walk behind you.' She tells me I am 'good.' Essentially, I suppose. I tell her I will talk to hear that night, and I go to bed early...

I see another woman as I lie in bed, writing a book, she is turning through the pages with a pen in her hand, she tells me the book she is writing about me is too full of Death...and then I get a slap round the head, or just the image of it, and she shouts at me and tells me to 'TRY'!!...

So, how, Do I try now?

I have little money and debts, and Orlando finds it funny that I ate ants in my volvic bottle today, yet as soon as I did that I ran upstairs to read Chinese poetry, and another man flew by and threatened that he would tell 'some 'certain' men' I am gay, yet Erhu has ordered him dead, and we are near too many damned souls, she had been locked up for that, we do not want this to happen again...

I apologise I find it hard to write in this environment...I am still waiting for letters...