May 15//06

Monday, May 15, 2006
Mad Men, Love

I think I've been hit by a plane full of men, or mourners, it's making me feel really ill...

Last night, I spoke to my new second wife, yes she has a name, understand this is hard to write...she told God she loved me...

Baby names, perhaps celtic or hebrew, I have chosen some, some sound a little cosmopolitian, manga...but it is too early to do that, the erh, the 'arrival' would be rather well, there are impossibilites about any future babies here, perhaps...

Tried to read 101 dalmations to Orlando today, they are making us very ill, men drive past, and say they think they are hearing a 'mog' reading a childs book, i find it hard to read, use different voices for the character, not feel so ill, bad father, these are men that don't even cry, goyim devils one would call them, or pig men...my body is almost dead and these men kill, Becky my sister wouldn't even come to the shop with me today...

if they came back, and she said last night, they are flying here, we would be healed,

Orlando knows he is an heir, imagine, we find a castle in Ireland, move in there...all possibilties...

I spoke to her, whilst I sat on a chair in the garden, trying to get comfortable as I was 'knocked out' ready to sleep, she said I shouldn't take my pill because I feel the madmen who take it and that we would actually dream because usually the pills knock me out and i did dream, BUT, I could have slept anywhere in that chair in almost good air, but Mum came out said it would rain, and we both knew it wouldn't... I also hear someone I remember meeting here a while ago, she says she will take me to Istanbul, and we are both going through hell, and she can get me new rags, find a new job...and we can just spend a holiday at her expense, though she can't find me because of 'family' problems...etc.shussh, and talking to both of them brings i love you, i love you, whirling through my mind...

And I dreamt, whilst men still shout past in their cars, and something happened, and I heard the neighbour say she could feel me, and I could feel the killing men, and she almost became demonic, and I'm part in a fight with these men, and I'm hearing people talk to me as they fly over, like a drunk man who can't move, and she kisses my left hand and calls me a swine:

and then I come back, and lay around hungry, and hear:

'Louie, I can't hold on!!'

My first wife has gone to speak directly to God with her family, because of what being near this motorway outside the door as I sleep on the sofa does, and ------- tells me this, and I make noodles in the kitchen, while they are telling me to pray, and as the water boils, I sit on a chair, and move into evrit or perhaps magically nonsense words, and then I move into the front room into the darkness, and I see a light flash through before my eyes, and I tell God I do not want to be like these men...

AND these men don't even cry, they break things, but I can't hear them whilst I pray because the road is empty for a while, or I just can't hear them, or I'm sitting there trying to order PRAYER but there is no one there...

Something's just hit me on TV too, and I've just shouted if they do that they are only just going to burn...

SO GODS PEOPLE, THERE ARE COMING BACK...soon.

please pray, be quiet, remember this has become a soul war or I feel it has, but that sounds piggish, my tongue flipped out because I 've just heard a man shout and threaten on TV, she has just told me he is a snake...

It rained earlier, Adel was crying...

my second dream: there was blood on mine and Esu's knee, it looked like nail varnish, BECAUSE before I woke up in front of the TV again (I never switch the devil on), and she made the mistake of being there as 'Daphne', a strange dream, Daphne's grandmother has died, and she has told Dapnhe that if she does this conversation through the TV again 'we are in a fix', I met her grandmother when I wanted to deliver a letter, and wondered why I was there, perhaps to pray, or just have tea with a nice well spoken woman...

so

? good ending huh??

almost...